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Lan Sizhui has known who his soulmate was since he was six years old.
He used to lie awake tracing his fingers over the characters on his inner arm, amazed at how it came to pass that a foundling boy like him could have a soulmate in the great and influential Jin clan. He vowed, back then, that he would try and become the very best disciple of the Lan clan he could possibly be in order to be worthy of his soulmate. He worked hard to follow all of Hanguang Jun's instructions, to learn as much as he could. It wasn't just about his soulmate, of course, he was grateful to Lan Zhan for taking him in when he had nobody else, and he wanted to do well for his sake as well, but he'd be lying if he said the name on his arm didn't motivate him even more.
When he met Jin Ling, back then, accompanying Lan Zhan on a visit to Carp Tower, he hadn't gotten on very well with him. Sizhui was serious and thoughtful and remembered his manners, and Jin Ling... well, he was a little volatile. Sizhui decided he must not have gotten his mark yet, and he didn't want to embarrass him by bringing it up, so he patiently waited for Jin Ling to be the first to mention it.
The years went by and it became more and more likely that the lack of mention was deliberate. In fact, when Sizhui tried to bring up soul marks as a gentle way of getting to that point, Jin Ling would shut him down - angrily, too. He did that with everybody, and soon they all learned not to bring it up around him.
Eventually, Sizhui was forced to come to the heartbreaking conclusion that Jin Ling was disappointed. That he didn't want him.
He threw himself into his studies again, this time to try and forget. If he couldn't have the happiness of true love in his life, he could at least be someone his father and his sect could be proud of.
Mostly, he was glad that one of the many Lan principles forbade discussion of soulmarks, it meant people were less likely to bring them up around him, too, and that he had a reason to change the subject when they did. Even Jingyi didn't know what his mark said - though not for lack of trying, certainly.
Still, he became friends with Jin Ling - he couldn't bring himself to stay away, and the other boy certainly didn't seem to mind him being around either - and they often went on Nighthunts together, along with Jingyi and Zizhen, and they were getting pretty good at it, they worked well together.
This one was proving a little more difficult than usual, though, and the four had become separated.
"Jin Ling?" Sizhui called, moving carefully through the forest "Jingyi? Zizhen?"
He used to lie awake tracing his fingers over the characters on his inner arm, amazed at how it came to pass that a foundling boy like him could have a soulmate in the great and influential Jin clan. He vowed, back then, that he would try and become the very best disciple of the Lan clan he could possibly be in order to be worthy of his soulmate. He worked hard to follow all of Hanguang Jun's instructions, to learn as much as he could. It wasn't just about his soulmate, of course, he was grateful to Lan Zhan for taking him in when he had nobody else, and he wanted to do well for his sake as well, but he'd be lying if he said the name on his arm didn't motivate him even more.
When he met Jin Ling, back then, accompanying Lan Zhan on a visit to Carp Tower, he hadn't gotten on very well with him. Sizhui was serious and thoughtful and remembered his manners, and Jin Ling... well, he was a little volatile. Sizhui decided he must not have gotten his mark yet, and he didn't want to embarrass him by bringing it up, so he patiently waited for Jin Ling to be the first to mention it.
The years went by and it became more and more likely that the lack of mention was deliberate. In fact, when Sizhui tried to bring up soul marks as a gentle way of getting to that point, Jin Ling would shut him down - angrily, too. He did that with everybody, and soon they all learned not to bring it up around him.
Eventually, Sizhui was forced to come to the heartbreaking conclusion that Jin Ling was disappointed. That he didn't want him.
He threw himself into his studies again, this time to try and forget. If he couldn't have the happiness of true love in his life, he could at least be someone his father and his sect could be proud of.
Mostly, he was glad that one of the many Lan principles forbade discussion of soulmarks, it meant people were less likely to bring them up around him, too, and that he had a reason to change the subject when they did. Even Jingyi didn't know what his mark said - though not for lack of trying, certainly.
Still, he became friends with Jin Ling - he couldn't bring himself to stay away, and the other boy certainly didn't seem to mind him being around either - and they often went on Nighthunts together, along with Jingyi and Zizhen, and they were getting pretty good at it, they worked well together.
This one was proving a little more difficult than usual, though, and the four had become separated.
"Jin Ling?" Sizhui called, moving carefully through the forest "Jingyi? Zizhen?"
Look it was this or do work.
Date: 2023-06-26 12:48 pm (UTC)It killed Jin Ling, because he knew how much Jin Guanyao would love that kind of thing, but he shut down that conversation as best as his pubescent manners would allow. Refused even to talk about it.
In that way, he was grateful that his jiujiu never even raised the subject. It wasn't perfect - Jiang Cheng left a silence around the topic that was louder than it just not existing - but it worked for Jin Ling. He was never even questioned when he wore sleeves to swim in the lakes around Lotus Pier - though he had caught enough sight of the scarring around his jiujiu's arm that he suspected he might have a sympathetic ear should he ever bring it up.
But given the history of the Jiang Clan, how could he confess that his soulmate was a Wen?
Meeting Lan Sizhui, and making friends with disciples of the Lan clan was a relief: they were forbidden even to discuss soulmarks, and while Lan Jingyi and even Lan Sizhui seemed inclined to want to break that discussion, hey were easy to shut down.
The trouble was, that the more time he spent with his friends, the more he grew to resent and hate the very concept of soulmarks. Because he was beginning to think it would be nice to choose someone. And he was beginning to think he would know who he would choose if he could. And that felt like heresy to even contemplate.
He'd just have to content himself by spending time with people he enjoyed spending time with.
Today, though, he's managed to get separated from his companions, and is beginning to get worried. He has no reason to be worried, of course - he's a skilled Cultivator and can probably take down any evil spirits on his own, or so he tells himself.
But the more time he spends alone, the more he struggles to silence the little voice that says this is going to end badly. So he walks through the forest slowly, an arrow nocked on his lowered bow, and tries to focus on being ready, rather than what he's ready for.
When he hears Sizhui's voice calling his name, the relief is overwhelming.
"Sizhui!" he calls back, sounding just a little bit more happy than he should, if he had been as cool and unbothered by the separation as he'd like his friend to think he was.
Re: Look it was this or do work.
Date: 2023-06-26 01:10 pm (UTC)The sound of that voice calling his name with such joy and relief shouldn't, he think, make his heart leap quite so spectacularly, but of course it does.
"Jin Ling!" He calls again, a touch of relief colouring his own words - the other two were still out there somewhere, but it would be safer and easier to find them together - and moves towards where he heard the sound coming from.
They should probably be a little quieter, lest they draw the attention of any monsters or spirits before they're able to meet up again, but for once Sizhui is not thinking entirely sensibly.
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Date: 2023-06-26 07:45 pm (UTC)"Where are you?" he calls. "Wait, stay where you are, I'll come to you."
He's got a pretty good idea of the direction Sizhui was in, and heads slowly in that direction, all his attention focused keenly on that voice.
And none of it on the forest behind him.
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Date: 2023-06-26 08:12 pm (UTC)Sizhui can at least see the sense in that suggestion - better one of them stay still rather than both of them stumbling around looking for one another, so he stops where he is, resting a hand on his sword hilt just in case.
After a few seconds he realises that he should probably say something so that Jin Ling can actually follow the sound of his voice, rather than just guessing where it had come from.
"I've stopped by a fallen tree, there's a patch of wildflowers near the trunk," he offers - his volume has lowered a little, finally, but he hopes it's still loud enough for Jin Ling to hear. He doesn't know if the description will be helpful, but it's more for the sake of speaking than anything else.
In the still of the forest, he thinks he can hear something moving. His grip tightens around his sword.
"...Jin Ling ..?"
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Date: 2023-06-27 09:20 pm (UTC)And there's only one of Jin Ling. Whereas moving between the trees, now becoming more visible, are at least three or four large grey wolves: heads down, ears back, not even growling in the silence of the forest.
If you're used to dogs the size of Fairy, wolves can be shockingly big when you first see them. These are even bigger, and their eyes weep black smoke, as they creep towards the young man in white.
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Date: 2023-06-27 09:32 pm (UTC)Hearing Jin Ling's voice again is sort of a relief. On the one hand, it confirms he's not alone, on the other... well. It confirms he's not alone.
He swallows nervously as the animals approach, gaze flicking between them as he takes the precious few seconds he has left to try and strategise. He doesn't even really have time to call out to Jin Ling, he needs to keep his entire focus on the beasts slowly surrounding him.
There's a tree at his back, at least, making it harder to be attacked from directly behind - but that's a small mercy when it also blocks off an avenue of escape.
He draws his sword, scabbard clattering to the ground as he also reaches into his robe to pull out a talisman. One of the wolves leaps and Sizhui drives it away with a swing of his sword, the talisman being flung to the ground with a bang that dazes one of the others.
He's skilled, and strong, and smart - but they would be hard enough to fight one on one, let alone one on four. It's only a matter of time before he's in serious trouble.
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Date: 2023-06-27 09:43 pm (UTC)Ling doesn't call out to him, he just pauses long enough in the woods to really listen for the sounds of fighting, and when he hears the sound of a scabbard falling to the ground, he runs quickly in that direction, picking up his pace with the sound of the explosion.
The second he comes into sight of the battle, he doesn't hesitate. Four arrows nock on his bow string and he leaps into the air, firing all four down to the wolves, hitting them in the neck and shoulders as best he can before he lands next to Sizhui, his hand already reaching for more arrows.
"Are you okay?" he asks, hoping he sounds more like the gallant hero he wants to be, then the scared and worried little boy he feels like.
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Date: 2023-06-27 09:52 pm (UTC)Sizhui is already starting to feel his energy flag, just a little, when the wolves emit a glorious chorus of yelps and Sizhui could kiss Jin Ling in that moment.
He wouldn't, of course, because that would be inappropriate and his feelings about Jin Ling are his own business and the other young man clearly has no interest in pursuing their bond and-
And also they're still in the middle of a fight. The arrows have injured the wolves, slowed them down a little but they're still standing.
"I'm okay." He confirms, a little breathless. It's not a lie... depending on your definition of okay.
He turns away from Ling just slightly, just enough that between them they have a wider field of vision, and so that Ling doesn't see quite how badly the sleeve on his sword arm is torn - or the tell-tale spread of red from beneath the fabric. It probably looks worse than it is, he thinks, and they have more important things to focus on.
With the distraction of Ling's arrival he manages to finish off one of the wolves, which means there's only three left to deal with - it's not a done deal, but they're all three injured and Ling is fresh to the fight, Sizhui's odds are looking a whole lot better now.
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Date: 2023-06-28 01:35 pm (UTC)The wolves don't leap straight away - they start pacing around the two cultivators, approaching each other, but with their eyes on the swords.
"They're going to leap together," Ling says, aware that he's stating the obvious but making sure Sizhui knows. "Go low."
If they work together, they can take the wolves. If their swords clash with each other, they're both dead.
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Date: 2023-07-03 08:17 am (UTC)So when the letter arrives from Jin Guangyao - and never mind how insulting it is to be informed by letter - inviting him to Carp Tower to meet with Hanguang Jun to discuss arrangements, he puzzles over it for half an hour before writing a reply in the affirmative.
But he wants to talk to someone else first.
So this is why, a day or two before the scheduled meeting, a disciple is sent running through the Unclean Realm to tell Nie-zongzhu that Sandu Shengshou is here and is requesting a private council.
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Date: 2023-07-03 09:02 am (UTC)Visits from Jiang Cheng are not exactly commonplace. Visits from anybody are not exactly commonplace, especially ones that he hasn't arranged himself. He likes it that way, it's easier to work the delicate balance of appearing the fool while also keeping his clan functioning if he doesn't have an audience.
It's also easier to stop himself from getting distracted when Jiang Cheng isn't around. He tries to avoid the man as best he can but sometimes (all the time) he's just drawn to him, like a moth to a flame... and just as likely to get burned if he gets too close.
At least Guangyao isn't here; he's well aware that his 'san-ge' doesn't view him as an enemy, but that doesn't mean he wants to show his weaknesses. A private meeting with Cheng might damage his poor heart, but it shouldn't risk his plans.
Still, he agrees to the meeting and calls for tea, and when Cheng is shown into the audience chamber, Huaisang is sitting behind his desk fidgeting nervously with his fan.
The nerves aren't entirely just for show.
"Ah, Jiang-zongzhu! Please, come in, what brings you to my door?"
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Date: 2023-07-03 09:15 am (UTC)He also used to be Jiang-xiong, a lifetime ago.
Not knowing exactly how to start the conversation, he sits, accepts the initial pleasantries of tea, and then silently hands over the letter.
Which is a perfectly typical and harmless seeming Jin Guangyao missive. Beautiful calligraphy, carefully crafted words. Jin-zongzhu requests the presence of Jiang-zongzhu at Carp Tower to meet with Hanguang Jun to discuss the future of Jin-gongzi and his soulmate, Lan Sizhui.
Blah blah blah.
He gives Nie Huaisang plenty of time to read it before he speaks.
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Date: 2023-07-03 09:28 am (UTC)Huaisang is a little confused when Cheng just hands him the letter without saying anything, though he's not quite as confused as his expression might suggest - he knows Cheng well enough to understand that he's struggling to say whatever he came here to say, and the letter should shed some light on it.
When he reads the letter, however, he's no less confused.
His spies at Carp Tower do check in on Jin Ling occasionally, just so he knows if he needs to take action to keep the boy safe - he wouldn't put it past Guangyao to do something to him, and he knows how much Cheng cares for his nephew. It's not just about Cheng, admittedly, there's something in the way that Guangyao dotes on the boy that's... familiar. He wants to try and protect Jin Ling from the betrayal he experienced, if he can.
Which is all to say that he's aware of the teasing he's been through about his soulmate over the years, and he - like Jiang Cheng - realises immediately that it's a little odd for it so suddenly turn out to be one of his best friends.
The thing is, he doesn't know why Cheng is here talking to him about it. He doesn't think Cheng knows that he knows any of this, and he's not exactly involved in the situation, so what? Is he just here to vent that he has to have this meeting with Wangji? He doesn't have many other friends, really, so Huaisang can understand that.
"Oh..." he says eventually, sliding the letter back across the table to him "Um... that's... that's very good for Jin Ling... isn't it?" he prompts gently.
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Date: 2023-07-03 09:40 am (UTC)Before today.
"My nephew," he explains, having rehearsed this bit a little on the way and having his words carefully chosen, "stopped baring his arms when he was eight years old. Even to swim at Lotus Pier he has always worn robes. He has never shown his soulmate mark to anyone."
This is hard, in Yunmeng. It's easy enough for Lans and Jins and every sect mired in propriety and modesty. But Jiang disciples are always in and out of the water - it's only normal for someone to catch sight of a mark. Jiang Cheng, though, has made the effort to protect his nephew's secrets even without asking about them.
"What reasons can you think of that a young man might keep this secret?"
That's not the full reason why he's here, but it's still part of it: there are one or two people who have managed to keep this secret from their closest friends, so here Jiang Cheng is, finally raising a subject that hasn't been raised for a decade and a half.
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Date: 2023-07-03 10:01 am (UTC)Oh, maybe because his soulmate had somebody else's name...
Huaisang understands, though, why Cheng wants to talk about this with someone, why he's concerned - and he thinks, perhaps, he might understand why that someone is him. Why that someone is another person that Cheng has seen get awfully cagey about their mark and discussions of soulmates.
The look of friendly curiosity that broke his heart is still burned into his memories.
"I know Lan Sizhui is adopted, so it's possible his name is different and Jin Ling never made the connection before..." he says thoughtfully - he doesn't normally puzzle through these things out loud, but Cheng deserves at least a slight dropping of the headshaker act, when they're alone.
"I'm not sure why that would make him so secretive about it, though..."
Only... er-ge was so concerned about that adoption, he recalls, and he never explained why. Huaisang had always just assumed that he thought Wangji wasn't in the place to go adopting a child, after Wei Wuxian died, but is there more to it than that...?
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Date: 2023-07-03 10:19 am (UTC)Jiang Cheng watches Huaisang think it through, and marvels that he's watching Huaisang think something through. That he'd actually come up with an answer that makes sense rather than panicking at being asked a question, claiming not to know anything.
He was watching Huaisang for another explanation, a second reason that might make more sense in the context of Huaisang's own secrets. So that answer takes him by surprise, because honestly he came here with two questions on his mind, and they've been so tied up in his mind that he wasn't expecting them to have separate answers.
He is shocked into silence for a second.
"I always assumed it was a name he didn't want to be associated with," he says. "That the name itself was enough to shame him."
There's only one name that springs to mind. But what would someone of that name be doing in the Lan Sect?
Except...
It hadn't been until the letter arrived that Jiang Cheng really realised who Lan Sizhui's formal guardian was.
"Lan Wangji..." he mutters, accusingly.
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Date: 2023-07-03 10:28 am (UTC)Jin Ling's shame and Lan Xichen's concern come together to paint a very vivid picture, and knowing Lan Wangji's attachment to Wei Wuxian and his visit to the burial mounds only add a frame. It's just... Huaisang is missing a key piece of information that confirms whether or not the picture is even possible.
The way Jiang Cheng mutters Wangji's name, on the other hand, suggests he might have that information. To extend the analogy, Huaisang is all ready to paint that picture, he just needs Cheng to hand him the brush.
"What about Lan Wangji...?" He prompts gently.
(He's very intrigued by this puzzle, he has to admit, partially because of his concerns surrounding Jin Guangyao and partially just because it's interesting - but he also picked up on that other question that Jiang Cheng seems inclined to ask about after all this time, and the more they focus on his nephew, the less they focus on him.)
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Date: 2023-07-05 09:13 am (UTC)He's unsurprised that the Lans are already there - and that Lan Xichen has come along as well, maybe to support Sizhui's interests, maybe just to see Jin Guangyao. Jiang Cheng exchanges courtesy greetings with them, but no more than he has to - he hasn't had time to work out how he feels about Lan Wangji's actions yet. And he didn't like the man very well to start with.
Shortly after the evening meal he goes for a walk around the gardens Jin Zixuan planted for Yanli, and there Jin Ling comes to meet him.
The conversation starts - unfairly, in Ling's opinion - with how unlikeable his father was and how his mother disliked him so much the engagement was called off. Then Cheng, in his one-sided way, explains that the engagement came back on when Yanli wanted it, when they both had a chance to choose each other.
Fortunately Ling knows his uncle well enough to understand the meaning of the parable - you don't have to choose the person in your soulmate mark. You can choose anyone or no one, and your jiujiu will stand right by that choice.
Jiang Cheng thinks he is saying if you don't want to be with a Wen you can back out. But if you do want him I support you. Jin Ling hears: you don't have to be with the person on your arm if you'd rather be with Lan Sizhui.
Both of them end the conversation satisfied.
But then Jin Ling makes his way back through Carp Tower with a simple message for Lan Sizhui - Jiang-zongzhu wants to talk to him, if he's got a moment.
Not me forgetting that I turned off the email notifs on the main post
Date: 2023-07-05 11:56 am (UTC)He can't figure out a way to confirm it, though, because even a gentle probing about the character used for his name seems too close to asking outright, and he knows his father will guess why he's asking. If only he'd thought to ask before he told Hanguang Jun about Jin Ling, but how could he? He never even suspected a thing at that point.
Mostly, he just wants to get through this meeting without any undue arguments or anybody's secrets coming to light, and at least everybody seems to be on their best behaviour. He's practicing qin when Jin Ling finds him, something he's only really doing to calm his nerves and therefore something easily abandoned if the sect leader wants to speak to him.
Delaying would only make his nerves worse anyway.
He thanks Jin Ling for the message, tells his father where he's going and sets off in search of Jiang Cheng.
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Date: 2023-07-05 12:56 pm (UTC)But when he stands up and sees Lan Sizhui approach, he stays, lets the boy approach as he watches him.
He can see it now, maybe - though he wishes he remembers the child well enough to be certain. He carries himself like a Lan, of course, obeys their rules on dress and deportment, but he can also just about imagine this face covered in dry dirt, smiling up at every adult, doting on Wei Wuxian.
He wishes he couldn't believe it - that here, walking in Carp Tower, is the child that Wei Wuxian was raising. The child he was raising with Wen Qing - not like that, but if you can call him Wuxian's child, then he is clearly also hers.
Cheng wonders, in another lifetime, if he might have been his.
That is, however, not the important part. The important part is that he wants to be Jin Ling's, and Jin Ling is Cheng's child in every way that matters.
And - even carrying himself with Lan stiffness, he looks sweet and patient, and compassionate. Cheng isn't really surprised that he would look beyond Ling's brittle exterior and fall for the noble, passionate young man that Cheng is so proud of.
He just needs to confirm his theory - needs to know that they are actually soulmates, and aren't just two teenagers both trying to run from soulmates they don't want. He can't ask Ling about it without making the boy confess what he's clearly afraid to, so maybe Sizhui will help.
He waits for Sizhui to approach.
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Date: 2023-07-05 01:14 pm (UTC)Sizhui comes to a stop in front of Jiang Cheng and gives him a proper bow in greeting.
"Jiang-zongzhu, you wanted to see me?" He asks, soft and calm and diplomatic as ever, gentle question betraying none of the burning curiosity he feels about this meeting - or the fear. What does Jiang Cheng want to speak to him about? Jin Ling didn't seem to have any idea, so his best guess is that this is just Jiang Cheng wanting to meet him away from the formality of the negotiations tomorrow, wanting to make sure he's good enough for Jin Ling.
He knows that Sandu Shengshou's standards are high, and that he is not fond of Hanguang Jun - he hopes desperately that he manages to satisfy him enough that he doesn't cause problems. Jin Ling might argue with his uncle a lot, but would that extend to resisting him if he decided Sizhui was not a suitable match? He's not sure he wants to find out.
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Date: 2023-07-05 01:22 pm (UTC)"Lan Sizhui," he says. "Thank you for meeting me. I hope you weren't in the middle of anything? I just wanted to talk before the meeting tomorrow."
So Sizhui's expectations are confirmed - hopefully it's not too much of a surprise that he'd ask for this.
"My nephew speaks very highly of you."
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Date: 2023-07-05 01:34 pm (UTC)Sizhui is glad, at least, that his guess was correct - he's still worried he won't measure up, though.
"Of course, I'm happy to speak with you." He says pleasantly "You haven't interrupted anything."
The comment about Jin Ling brings a faint flush to his cheeks and he can't help but smile.
"I think very highly of him, too."
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Date: 2023-07-05 01:51 pm (UTC)He'd like it confirmed, of course.
"That's lucky," he says. "Some people don't always think so highly of their soulmates when they first meet them."
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Date: 2023-07-05 02:24 pm (UTC)Sizhui nods his understanding - technically speaking he was a little worried when he first met Ling, the meeting hadn't gone very well and it wasn't as though he didn't like the other boy, he just seemed so boistorous and opinionated that Sizhui was a little bit intimidated, worried that he would be mean.
It took some time to understand him, and there is a part of him that is glad they had the time for that understanding to grow without the pressure of them both knowing they were soulmates.
"I'm very lucky," he holds onto the fact that Ling likes him, wants him, and doesn't think about all the complications that make him feel far less lucky "Ling is... fierce, and proud, and passionate, I'm truly happy to have him in my life, especially as my soulmate."
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