Oh, oh, oh it's magic (Xie and Kevin)

[xie_er]

Zhao Jing used to be a nobody, born into influence and wealth but always in the shadow of those around him. In magical circles he was even worse, a barely-remembered witch that didn't have enough power for any familiar to even consider looking twice at him.

Somehow, though, after many years (and a few suspicious deaths), he's managed to climb his way to the CEO of Five Lakes, his power - of both kinds - growing exponentially.

The previous CEO was surrounded by some unfortunate rumorus before his death, so Zhao Jing has been focused on repairing the reputation of he company and solidifying his support, mundane and magical, which means it is far too delicate a moment for Xie to be in the spotlight, even if he was promised he'd be allowed to stop hiding when the position was in Zhao Jing's hands.

He just has to wait a little longer, that's all, and it's not like it's difficult to only appear in his animal form whenever Zhao Jing is in public, just uncomfortable, and the last thing they need is for somebody to recognise Xie for any of the things he's done to help his witch get where he is today, when his position is still so precarious...

He tells himself all the excuses he's heard from Yifu, repeats them in his head like a mantra as he sits through all the meetings and negotiations, a little black cat and Zhao Jing's feet, watching the men and women he's speaking to for anything Yifu can use. He hangs around when Zhao Jing steps out the room, listens to what they say behind his back - that's his job with normal people, to be a pair of ears they don't realise are there. Even paranoid types who scan for bugs would miss him, which he finds funny, privately, because he is a bug of a sort.

Not that he's allowed to take his original animal form - a scorpion would be out of place if anybody caught sight of him, and Yifu doesn't like the idea of him hiding in pockets or anything like that. He says it's dangerous, that something could happen to him, but Xie privately thinks he just finds the form creepy. Even around other magical people, the cat is preferred - his job with them is to be a reminder that Zhao Jing has a familiar, and a relatively powerful one at that.

It's hard for familiars to change the form they can take, but he did it, for Yifu.

He tells people the cat is called Scorpion, and that somebody else named him - which is technically true, Xie does mean scorpion, and his parents named him - and that he's vaguely embarrassed to have such a fiercely named cat.

(He doesn't tell magical people anything at all, they know Xie isn't a pet so they're less likely to ask, at most they will wonder why his familiar always stays in animal form. Zhao Jing just tells them he's shy. He isn't, he doesn't care about people seeing him, but it's easier to do the things Yifu wants him to do when nobody knows what he looks like)

Xie hadn't always known he was powerful - when Yifu had taken him in he'd been told he wasn't much, but that maybe he could be useful. Later, when some witch had made an offhand comment about it, the story had become that Yifu recognised his power and took him in before anybody else could steal him away, that he just wanted to protect Xie from the people who would use him for his power. Xie was already so far gone by that point that he accepted it, that he told himself he was lucky he had Yifu to protect him, to guide him.

It's funny how easy it is to lie to yourself.

When the meetings are over for the day he finally shifts back to human form, spending a few minutes stretching out the kinks that come from forcing himself into a form that isn't quite his, especially with how much he's had to do it over the last few weeks, and then going in search of something to eat. He could probably just head back to his own apartment since he doesn't think Yifu needs anything else from him, not today, but the outsiders have all left and everybody in Yifu's manor at least knows Xie, even if they don't know that Xie and Scorpion are one and the same, so it's safe to be around them.

He likes to spend as much time here as he can get away with, likes to remind Yifu he can be useful in other ways... and maybe he likes to keep an eye on this new apprentice Yifu has taken on. He doesn't understand why he needs anybody else when he has Xie, but the last time he'd questioned somebody new in the house Yifu hadn't spoken to him for a week, so he doesn't voice that thought out loud - he just watches the guy suspiciously every chance he gets, and wonders how easy he would be to get rid of.

He's halfway to the kitchen when something makes him stop. A tug of power, the vague echo of chanting, there's a ritual happening and something about it is drawing him close. He frowns, confused, and follows the pull...

Comments

[xie_er]

"It's where my parents were from" And god, he hasn't thought about them in forever. That's probably terrible. Or maybe it's for the best, he can't imagine they ever hoped he'd end up the way he did.

He tilts his head so he can see and pour out the shampoo, but doesn't quite look at Kevin - he's talking about things that are too personal to risk actually making eye contact.

"I was born there, I think, but I don't remember it. I lived in Hong Kong before I came here"

Before Yifu brought him here, but he phrases it deliberately to cut him out, more spite, and petty, but weirdly satisfying.

[weird_cop]

Kevin turns it into a head massage, because that at least he knows how to do.

Hong Kong - yeah that makes sense, Zhao did come to the UK from Hong Kong.

"Were your parents familiars?"

Such a stupid question, he thinks. But he never considered this until he had one of his own.

"Sorry, I'm being ignorant again."

[xie_er]

He can be as ignorant as he likes if he keeps massaging Xie's scalp like that.

"Mama was a Familiar, baba was a witch" Xie admits, he hasn't thought about them in so long he still hasn't grown out of referring to them in those terms in his head, it seems. He'd be embarrassed, but he doesn't think Kevin is going to say anything about it, not right now.

He doesn't remember his parents very well, but he thinks... he thinks maybe they were one of the exceptions. Like Wen Kexing and Zhou Zishu. He blames them for that, a little bit, if they'd been like the other bonds he'd seen, he might not have been taken in by Yifu so easily...

[weird_cop]

"Huh."

He thinks the word, just the word, thinking about all the familar-witch pairs he knows, what they all have in common.

"Is that common?"

[xie_er]

"Is what common?" Xie asks, confused what he means for a second until understanding suddenly dawns.

"Oh. You mean them being a couple? It happens sometimes. You've met Kexing and Zishu. I've met plenty that aren't like that, though"

He can understand how it happens though, when you work so closely with someone.

[weird_cop]

And... Xie and Zhao, Kevin thinks. A fucked up shadow of what those two couples have.

"Xie," He asks, pausing in his massage in order to grab the shower head again, "how old were you, when you bonded with Zhao?"

[xie_er]

He didn't want to think about him... but he supposes it was inevitable, really. He just knows Kevin isn't going to like the answer. He already wants to explain it, already wants to add qualifiers about how he was older the first time anything happened, wants to...

He wants to defend him. Still. Even now.

He shoves aside the impulse and just takes a breath, decides to just answer the question.

"Fourteen."

[weird_cop]

Kevin doesn't say anything as he starts to rinse Xie's hair, watch the soapy water drain into the bathtub and down the drain, presumably taking his blood with it, the last injury Zhao will inflict.

"I know you're sick of people expressing pity. So I won't."

He has to use his bad hand to run down Xie's hair, make sure the soap is out.

"When I was fourteen, I was living in a nice neighbourhood, went to a nice school."

He's not sure why he's sharing it. Maybe it's some sort of exchange of stories, maybe he wants to show what a normal fourteen year old childhood should look like.

Maybe, he wants to share some of his own pain.

"But I had to take the bus with a lot of local kids who didn't like that I was posh, soft-spoken, and Black. And really wanted me to know it."

[xie_er]

Had he been that obvious? Apparently. He's still grateful.

He listens quietly to the story - he's gotten to know Kevin well enough to know that there's a reason he's telling it, that he's not just... bragging about how much better his life was when he was 14.

"What did they do?" He asks softly.

It's funny, really, when he was younger he wouldn't have believed anybody who told him being rich and comfortable didn't always mean you were happy - now he knows first hand how true it can be.

[weird_cop]

"Names, obviously. Batty boy, like they knew. Posh boy, homo. White kids had their own words for me of course."

It feels easier for him to describe than he thought it would - he hasn't talked about it with many people, but he has faced it.

"Spat on me, made me eat cigarette butts - fag ends, get it? - and wet toilet paper. Punching, kicking. Pissed on me a few times."

He stops his list in order to hand Xie the conditioner bottle for the next round.

"Too Black for the white kids, too everything else for the Black ones. That's how I learned to live between worlds."

[xie_er]

Xie can absolutely understand not really fitting in, the way people reject anything that's other. He hasn't really experienced that kind of abuse, everything Yifu did was a lot more subtle, but they've both been hurt, both bear the scars the world has left on them. Literally, in some cases.

There's no way to compare what they've been through, but that doesn't mean they can't give each other understanding.

He pours out the conditioner and thinks what the best response to give is. Not pity, or platitudes, Kevin is probably as tired of those as he is.

"Do you remember any of their names?" He says eventually "Not that I'd plan to escape police custody and stab anybody for you, of course."

He is joking (...mostly) but it feels... right. Banter, a way to lift the heavy mood, but a sort of solidarity at the same time.

[weird_cop]

Kevin snorts out loud, so it was probably the right direction to take.

"It doesn't matter who the individuals were. I got on that bus again as an adult and rode it straight into Hell."

If he's a bit smug about that, Xie will have to excuse him.

[xie_er]

Xie considers this for a moment, vaguely impressed and wildly curious.

"You'll have to tell me that story sometime." He says eventually, because it sounds like it would be an interesting one.

He's tempted to ask how bad it is, so he knows what to expect, but he feels like that might not go over very well, it's a little too true to be funny. "Diminished responsibility" probably doesn't get you out of eternal damnation.

He drags his mind away from that cheery thought.

"How many times have you replied 'been there' to people telling you to go to hell?"

[weird_cop]

"Not as often as Jimmy, whose experience was a bit more literal."

Kevin's bus journey took him to a metaphorical Hell, an Outer Borough. Quill's... well.

He continues to comb the conditioner gently through Xie's hair, marveling at the texture and the way it feels on his fingers.

"I think... what I'm trying to say is that facing up to these things is really powerful. And it puts the power back into our hands. And... I'm going to be there for you."

[xie_er]

There's a moment where the pretend feels so real; the gentle fingers running through his hair, the certain reassurance, it feels warm and true and genuine...

And then reality creeps cold down his back as if he'd been doused in ice. Of course Kevin is going to be there for him, because it's his job. Kevin's kindness is genuine, but only insofar as he's a kind person who wants to help. Wants to take Yifu down, too, and he'll probably do anything for Xie now he's agreed to hand over the key to doing it.

Kevin will be there for him until the moment the bond is broken and then... then nobody will be there for him. Ever again. Not in the way that matters, anyway, the way he needs.

And yet... and yet he's still going to cling to it, for as long as it's offered, because he's starved for it. Desperate in his pathetic, aching need to be cared for, to live in the fantasy that somebody could care for him.

"Thank you"

[weird_cop]

The irony is that in that moment thsts not what Kevin means. He has a real admiration for Xie's courage right now, and feels a connection he doesn't think is the link.

He'll be there for Xie while he sits through his statement, be there for him as he goes through the separation, and then...
...well, it depends on his sentence.

As friends, yes. Despite the way those sinuous back muscles dance under his wet hair. Kevin has the sense to recognise what's not appropriate.

He completes the rest of the rinse in relative silence, just enjoying the feeling of the silk hair over his hands, before every ounce of conditioner has gone, and Xie's hair is clean, wet, and unbearably soft.

"Okay, what happens now?"

[xie_er]

The temptation to just flick his head back and shower Kevin with water is, for a moment, ridiculously strong. The only thing that stops him is the strong possibility the move would hurt his injured shoulder, but it's a close thing.

"Pass me a towel?" He asks instead, lifting his good arm to carefully squeeze the excess water out of his hair - and take a moment to appreciate how nice it feels to have clean hair after the whole day of grotty dried blood in it.

He towels it off carefully and then drapes the towel over his shoulders as he stands carefully, using his hand to sweep his hair back as he lifts his head.

"Now it just needs combing." Which, technically he can do himself, but if Kevin happens to offer...

[weird_cop]

Kevin does what he's told and stands back to watch, keeping an eye on the hair like somehow he can help with it.

"Right," he confirms, just assuming he was being nominated for combing duty. "I saw a comb..."

It came in with the shampoo. He brandishes it cheerfully.

[xie_er]

He's a little relieved, if he's honest, he wasn't sure if they would have brought the comb or just a hairbrush, and he wasn't going to use a brush on wet hair if he could help it.

The apparent acceptance that he was going to do the combing was also nice, for all that Xie was reluctant to let anybody else help, it turns out he's not quite ready to give up on being taken care of just yet.

"We should sit." He says, heading back towards the bedroom, figuring it made sense to just go back where they were before.

His eyes stray to the broken pendant sitting on the bedside table and for a moment he falters, but then he resolutely drags his gaze away and sits down with his back to it.

He fidgets for a moment, frowning uncomfortably before leaning to the side and reaching under his leg, pulling out a broken shard of the lamp. Sheepishly, he sets it aside without comment.

[weird_cop]

Kevin collects a handful of ceramic shards which he adds to the new pile.

"We could get it fixed," he muses. "Lisa has been talking about trying Kintsugi."

But he sits, unconsciously placing himself between Xie and the pendant, starting the combing process slowly.

It should be possible with one hand, but he keeps trying to use his burned hand to hold hair and occasionally winces.

After a while he starts to tell Xie more about Lisa, about how she was the daughter of Alfie Toshack; the niece of Rob Toshack, the King of London and among other things, a fratricide. How she dedicated her life to destroying the uncle who murdered her father, a fourteen year old girl who had her nose broken by a 500 year old witch to terrify her into silence and instead just put her head down and became the best analyst in the Met.

He doesn't think she'd mind.

"And that was before she got the Sight."

[xie_er]

Xie considers this, wonders if he wants the reminder - except it's a reminder of the moment he took control of his own, and maybe that's not such a bad thing.

He gives a small hum of agreement - he's not sure, but there's no harm in fixing it, even if he doesn't want it to stay in his room in the end.

He almost says something, when he catches those winces of pain, but he holds his tongue - partly because if he gets grumpy then Kevin will stop combing his hair and it feels really nice.

The story is appreciated, too. It gives him some insight into Lisa, into why she seems to understand him - better than Tony, at any rate, though with the way this is going Xie suspects he has a story, too. He thought they looked down on him for being weak, broken, but maybe that's not really it. They're all broken too, or have been, and they're just... trying to deal with that. Trying to help, in their own way.

It still grates, he still doesn't want to see himself as a victim and his feelings about Yifu are, if anything, even more complicated than ever - but he understands a little better.

(It's not that hard, in truth, to like Lisa more. He already liked her, as much as he didn't want to admit to liking any of them)

[weird_cop]

Tony's story is less complicated: he was a shit, and then he had the fear of God put in him... literally. Kevin doesn't think he needs to know that.

"I don't think I can braid this." He's apologetic despite himself; even with two hands between them it seems a lot. "How do you want it?"

[xie_er]

Xie was expecting that - he'd have been surprised if Kevin knew how to do his braids even with both hands.

"It's okay, I think I can-" He starts, interrupting himself with action as he uses his good hand to sweep the hair over his shoulder. With careful, slow movements he manages to wind his hair into a single braid - he doesn't have to lift his arm too high that it's uncomfortable, and even moving slowly it's done quickly enough that the ache doesn't set in. He gropes for one of the abandoned ties and finishes it off, leaving it draped over his shoulder for ease. It's basic, but it keeps it neat and out of the way until he's able to do it properly again.

[weird_cop]

"Looks good."

Out loud, Kevin says:

"I'm going to go do my hand now so I can be up early in the morning and get everything set up. Let me know when you're ready and I'll let you know what to expect. I'll be there the whole time unless you don't want me."

[xie_er]

Xie nods, grateful and maybe a little intimidated to be reminded of what he's decided to do.

"Thank you... for that and... " he waves a vague hand at his hair. It's not even really what he's thanking him for, it's the help, the support, the reassurance... and his hair. He just doesn't know how to say all that.

He sits for a while once Kevin has gone, just trying to process everything. It had felt good, to take control, to do something pro-active (and destructive) and then make a decision, but it wasn't really dealing.

He lies back on the bed, finds another lamp shard when it digs into his back and sighs, sits up again and starts trying to pick all of the shards out of his bedding, making a little pile next to the broken pendant. Eventually he gets frustrated and bored, pulls on a shirt and goes downstairs to the living room to curl up on the couch instead.