It's all coming back to me now (Spot and Bucky)

[brooklynishere]

When the Hydra facility had been raided, the last thing anybody expected to find was a 16 year old kid on ice, and yet there he'd been. Steve had been the one to stop the Hydra scientist from shutting down the life support, but they hadn't got there in time to prevent the destruction of a good half the facility's records - including the ones about who the kid was or why he was there.

So what choice did they have but to wake him up and find out?

He was uncooperative at first, refused to give them any details other than the name 'Spot' and kept threatening to fight anybody that came close, though they managed to work out pretty easily that he was from Brooklyn and he'd been on the ice almost as long as Steve had. It's when he overhears a comment about Bucky that he seems to change his tune.

"Bucky Barnes?" he asks, and while he still seems wary, for the first time since he woke up he says something actually helpful "I'll talk to him. Tell him the name's Sean Conlon."

Comments

[brooklynishere]

There's already a reply from Peter on his phone, saying he definitely wanted to do it again, and Spot's about to reply when Bucky's words filter into his consciousness. He looks up, startled.

"What?" he frowns, mind racing through the possibilities "Who... who is it?"

[not_a_commie]

Bucky takes a breath, "I ... You're mother, Steve and I, she tracked us down after my trail, I told her when we found you, but she needed to think, she didn't want to hurt you or scare you. But she said if you want to, you can go see her." He licks his lips. "We started looking for any of your friends yesterday." He says watching for the boy's reaction.

[brooklynishere]

His mother... his mother is still alive, and has been in contact with Bucky and Steve since...

Since before they found Spot.

This whole time and she was just now saying he could see her... he doesn't know what to think.

"Oh..." he says quietly, staring at the ground as he tries to process it "I didn't... Why did she think... is she okay?"

[not_a_commie]

“She doing great, only thing she complains about is being 98, and how she lost you.” Bucky says. “She wanted to think, she remembers how we all felt when Steve and I went to see her, when Steve and I went to see a lot of people, The Commandos handled it the best, I should let you talk to Jim sometime he lives in California.” He pauses lost in memories for a moment, “seeing her will be hard might hurt, it’s up to you. Did it hurt seeing all my friends yeah, do I regret anything no.”

[brooklynishere]

For a long moment he just continues to stare at the floor. He gets what Bucky's saying, that it's probably going to be difficult, and he has to remind himself that it was a struggle for Bucky as an adult, he didn't know if it would be easier or harder for him when he's just a kid.

But he's also a kid who thought he'd never see his mother again, and now he's being told that he might actually be able to?

"I want to see her." he says eventually.

[not_a_commie]

Bucky has always been good with silence, he lets Spot take his time to think it over, the sound of some of the creature feature in the background.

He figured the kid would want to see her, he would do the same. He picks up his phone and shoots out a text to Molly. "She'll probably reply in the morning kiddo, with when you can come see her, she's in the Upper Eastside, made kind of a name for herself as a writer." He smiles.

"You think you'll be able to sleep tonight?" he asks in a voice that expects an honest answer but no less kind then it normally is.

[brooklynishere]

Spot just nods, wanting to take a little time to process the fact that his mother was alive and here in New York and nobody had told him until now.

"Yea," he says eventually "I mean, I guess. I don't know. Maybe." he's been pretty on edge all day and that gets kind of exhausting, so he is tired, he just doesn't know if he'll be able to sleep.

[not_a_commie]

“Just hang out here,” Bucky gets up and tosses a bag of popcorn into the microwave and bring a couple of cans of seltzer water, because neither of them need caffeine right now.

Steve comes down with his go bag and ruffles Sean’s hair, and gives Bucky a lingering kiss. “Back in a week and a half.” He says easily.

Bucky nods and kisses Steve again slapping him playfully on the ass as he heads out the door.

Bucky dumps the popcorn into a bowl and adds some extra butter. He tosses the kid a throw blanket, and puts the bowl of popcorn on the coffee table.

“Hang out and watch the old movie then.” He says flopping back into the sofa, “Wolfman Steve and I saw this in the theater.” He smiles a little.

[brooklynishere]

"Bye pop, stay safe." Spot says, fighting to keep his tone casual - normally it wouldn't be a problem, but he's kind of stressed out right now. The two of them always know if the other is off to do something dangerous, but Spot doesn't have anywhere near the level of clearance to find out anything about their missions, so he never knew if he needed to worry or not.

He usually did anyway, just in case.

"And get back on time." he adds.

He gets comfortable under the blanket and grabs a handful of popcorn, settling down to watch the movie.

[not_a_commie]

He looks over at Spot and smiles a little, "He'll be fine." He says easily, turning back to the movie and eating popcorn. It's an easy silence between them, but he can see the nerves in Sean's face.

The movie ends at around 1 am, "You think you can sleep now, kiddo?" He yawns stretching picking up the empty bowl and taking it into the kitchen, and rinsing it out.

"We'll figure out something to do tomorrow since it's just the two of us until your mom gets back to me." He smiles a little.

[brooklynishere]

"Yea..." he says, getting up off the couch with some reluctance. He's still got a lot on his mind but his racing thoughts have calmed well enough that he figures he might actually get some sleep.

"Good night dad..."

[not_a_commie]

"Night kid," Bucky smiles, "it's okay if you can't sleep just come down and watch another movie until you pass out, or wake me up." He says easily as they head upstairs.

He lets out a slow breath and takes a shower and scrubs his hair even though he already had one tonight, between Steve heading out, and Sean being a ball of stress he needed one.

He drys off, and pulls on a pair of Steve's sweats and sleeps on the blonde's side of the bed, a habit they both have whenever the other is gone.

[brooklynishere]

Spot nods, heading to bed.

He tries to sleep, but after a while gives up and goes back downstairs, he sneaks out into the yard for a cigarette and then picks out another movie, curling up on the sofa with the TV on low.

He drifts off eventually in front of the TV, and he's tired enough that he doesn't wake up and go to bed.

Which is why when Bucky comes downstairs in the morning he'll not only find Spot sprawled out on the couch fast asleep, but an open cigarette packet and lighter sitting on the coffee table.

[not_a_commie]

Bucky comes down the stairs still in steve's sweats, hair wild from sleeping with it a little damp and tied up. He sees the cigarettes and lets out a less than amused huff, he doesn't wake the kid, but he picks up the smokes and lighter and slips them into the pocket of the sweats.

He sets to making them an actual breakfast more than just the weekday cereal and fruit. He settles on making french toast and bacon.

[brooklynishere]

The sound of Bucky in the kitchen filters through his consciousness and he stretches the kinks out from sleeping on the couch, blinking awake.

He sits up, gaze falling to the coffee table... where he remembers leaving his cigarettes the night before. Swearing under his breath he checks the floor around in case they've fallen off, but nope. He falls back against the couch with a sigh, realising he's probably in for some kind of lecture.

[not_a_commie]

Bucky pokes his head around the corner to look at Sean, "Mornin' sunshine." Bucky says lips twitching a little. "OH? Are you looking for something?" He asks giving Spot a shit-eating grin.

"Come on breakfasts ready." He says putting two plates on the table, and the bottle of syrup. "Before you eat tho," He says setting the iPad next to Spot's plate, "Google smoker's lung." He says lips twitching, setting the pack down next to the iPad.

[brooklynishere]

Spot just sighs even deeper, knowing he's rumbled and that Bucky is enjoying this far too much.

He drags himself off the couch and over to the table. At least he's getting a good breakfast...

With a frown, he googles as instructed, pulling a face at the pictures it brings up.

"You tryin' to put me off my breakfast?" he asks.

[not_a_commie]

"Maybe," Bucky smirks, leaning over and clicking images, then clicking one of them, and using his fingers, to zoom in. "Oh look how good smoking is for your lungs," Bucky says lips twitching again.

He goes back and taps to an info page, "their gonna give you cancer." He says flopping down to eat his breakfast.

[brooklynishere]

Given that cigarettes were still being billed as good for you when Spot was growing up, it's taking some time for these ideas to sink in - he's heard it in vague terms before now, but this is the first time he's actually looked at the evidence. It was kind of gross.

"Is that really what it does to you? Really? Like how much of it makes them like that?" he wasn't just thinking about himself, his mind drifting to Race and his cigars.

[not_a_commie]

Bucky thinks for a minute tucking into his breakfast, "No one knows how long it take, or how much it takes, but they know if you start young, your lungs don't really grow like they should." He says honestly. "They used to give Steve 'asthma cigarettes..." he snorts shaking his head, "I had to stop smoking the normal ones, every time I'd light one up, Steve had an asthma attack. " He chuckles softly. "But these motherfuckers can cause all kinds ..." He huffs at himself for cursing, "Can cause all kinds of problems so you gotta start trying to stop, bud."

While they eating breakfast Bucky's phone beeps, and he looks at it and smiles, "Your mom wants to know if we'd like to meet her for lunch."

[brooklynishere]

Spot puts the ipad down and turns to his breakfast, his appetite not actually diminished by the awful pictures. He eats quietly for a moment, just listening to Bucky's explanation. Weirdly, it's the cursing that tips the scales - the fact that Bucky feels so strongly about it that he'll curse in front of Spot when he normally tries to hard not to, he ends up nodding after a few more moments of consideration.

"I'll try." he agrees. He doesn't smoke that often, so it should be easy... right?

He turns his attention back to his breakfast and he's nearly done when Bucky speaks again - which is good, because as soon as he says that he suddenly isn't sure he can eat another bite. He swallows the mouthful he already has and stares down at his plate for a second.

"Sure." he says, his voice sounding hollow and nervous even to him "That... sounds good."

[not_a_commie]

Bucky gives Spot that look, the look that says are you sure. He's quiet for a minute "you know, you can say no." He points out, "If you're not ready." He says, "I'll text her back and say you're not ready if that's what you need. Or we rip the bandaid off and she buys us lunch, and you talk." He gives Sean a reassuring smile. "It'll probably be someplace good, she made a name for herself as a writer." He adds.

[brooklynishere]

"No, it's fine, I... I wanna see her today." it's rushed and awkward and nerve-wracking but at the same time that's not going to get any better, and there's a tiny part of him that's scared the opportunity might slip away. He still doesn't know how this is going to go, but he's always been a rip-the-bandaid-off kind of person. He liked action over words.

[not_a_commie]

Bucky nods and squeezes the kid's shoulder as he steps out of the kitchen to call Molly and set up lunch. He comes back a few minutes later, "We'll be meeting her at 12:30." he says sitting back down next to Spot and taking a sip of his coffee. "You sure you're okay?"

[brooklynishere]

"Yea I'm fine." Spot eyes the cigarette packet longingly, but then his gaze flicks back to the ipad and his shoulders sag.

"I'm done eating, just gonna go get dressed." what he really needs is a distraction, so he glances at the clock thoughtfully for a second and then back to his dad.

"Remember how you said I could get a camera? Could... could we go looking for one before we go meet mom?"